Principally Family

Principle: To equip with principles; to establish, or fix, in certain principles; to impress with any tenet, or rule of conduct, good or ill.

Mention principles to most people today and they’re most likely to think you’re speaking about a headmaster or headmistress. As far as I’m concerned, to have principles is to live to the fullest of our potential. This may be a big challenge, but once you are able to accomplish it, it means you are fit to enjoy all you’ve worked so hard to achieve.

The “Meaning of Principle“, is not about defining the word by using the dictionary, but about finding out what it means to each of us personally in a way that would positively make us more conscious of the people around us and not be such selfish individuals.

More often than not, the formation of principles begins at home, with family. And it’s also during this time that some families decide that having principles means:

1. Spend as much time with the family because FAMILY COMES FIRST.

2. You must make time for family functions because FAMILY COMES FIRST.

3. You must come home in time for dinner because FAMILY COMES FIRST.

4. When a family member is in hospital, your life has to come to a standstill because FAMILY COMES FIRST.

5. If you have relatives from abroad down for a visit, you must entertain them because FAMILY COMES FIRST.

6. Never mind if you’ve been late for work or been taking a lot of leave to run errands for your father, mother, brother etc because FAMILY COMES FIRST.

7. If you are married you must follow your relatives back to their home town regularly and meet the other relatives you’ve only seen once in your entire life and who really don’t care if you’re dead or alive because FAMILY COMES FIRST.

8. You must run back to see your family when they say they miss you because FAMILY COMES FIRST.

9.You must quit your job if you work long hours and get a “normal” 9-5 job which will eventually turn you into a mindless zombie without goals or aspirations because FAMILY COMES FIRST.

10. If your father’s-brother’s-daughter’s-husband’s-uncle’s-wife is unwell, you must take leave because FAMILY COMES FIRST.

Ridiculous? Not really – I’ve heard it all before and I suppose if you think about it the situation is pretty nonsensical. Just because it’s family, it doesn’t mean you have to drop everything and run to them. Recently, I had some Malaysian turned American relatives visit me. They stopped by my office, I bought them lunch and came back to the office after that. I cannot stop my daily dealings just because a bunch of people flew a couple of thousand miles for a visit.

Family is family and that’s all well and good, but once you let them run your life, you will begin to resent them if you haven’t started already. You have to decide what’s best for you right now. Family can love you – but that’s not going to pay the bills and get you to where you want to be.

If you want to think of me as a cold-hearted, arrogant individual – I really don’t care. Because what I’m telling you is very real. And if you want to live in denial – go ahead, more power to you. Those of you who want to change, go find out what having principles means to you and stick to it – don’t do it to please anyone.

Also, if you take a look a winners and leaders, you find that these people always follow and implement their principles to the final ground, and we clearly see that they never fell sorry along the path that they have decided to walk on.